Jimmy Neutron: Boy RoadKill
by Ztarlight
Summary: ...Does this even NEED a summary? ---- Happy New Year! Chapter Four is ready for reading!
1. Cupcake of DOOM!

(Hiya, everybody! As you know, the Jimmy Neutron movie comes out today, and I decided to celebrate by posting a fic about the ice-cream head. What  
is this about, you might be asking. To sum it up, it's a heart-warming tale about Zim meeting the famed boy genius and spreading peace and joy through   
the land.)  
  
(j/k. XD Do you really think *I* would post something like *that*?!)  
  
("What *is* it about?" you all want to know. Well, read, my minions. Read and rejoice in the doom that I want to inflict. Rember to worship Jhonen   
Vasquez, the all-knowing, all-powerful creator of Invader Zim. And if you see John Davis walking down the street, kick him where it hurts and tell him  
that Jimmy is a stupid idea.)  
  
  
  
Jimmy Neutron, Boy Roadkill  
Prologue  
  
  
They really shouldn't have built a bakery next to the power plant.  
  
Then again, no one would have imagined that there would be a nuclear meltdown when Bob was out making his delivery.  
  
The radioactive waste flew everywhere, melting the sand into glass and eating away through the delivery trucks. Poor Bob didn't know what to do. His  
truck swerved left and right, trying to avoid the poisonous chemicals, when he ran over a puddle and melted his tire into rubber Heaven.  
  
More chemicals poured down from the sky, burning through the truck into the goods. Fearful for his life, Bob ran home. It was quite a while before he   
left his home. He had to get over the fact that nuclear waste does NOT rain down on an everyday basis.  
  
Weeks have passed. Several scientists have been over the site and, luckily, found no casualties. Just a lot of trash. They *did* manage to recover a  
package of cupcakes. Feeling it was unharmed, and being generally stupid overall, they brought it to the nearby supermarket to be sold.  
  
Unbeknownst to them, however, was the fact that the cupcaked *were* contaminated.  
  
And that fact that the cupcakes were bought later that day by a puppy...  
  
A puppy named Gir... 


	2. Arrival

Jimmy Neutron, Boy RoadKill  
Chapter One: Arrival  
  
  
"I'm home!" chirped a cheerful voice.  
  
"What took you so long, Gir?" Zim scolded as he marched into the hall.  
  
"I was getting cupcakes!!" Gir held up the package of bakey treats, one of which was glowing a bright green.  
  
"Ugh!" Zim spat. "Gir, where did you buy those... things?!"  
  
"At the Magik Sprinkle."  
  
"Well don't go there again. I think that one of your cupcakes is moldy."  
  
"Huh?" Gir opened the package and examined the fluorescent dessert. "Oh, yay! I got the fuzzies!!"  
  
Zim turned purple and threatened to heave. "F...fuzzies? You EAT mold?!"  
  
Gir shrugged. "So? It's yummy."  
  
At that moment, the doorbell rang. Outside, a voice could be heard screaming. "Open up, Zim! You can't hide from me forever!!"  
  
Zim growled. "Dib. Again. Oh, I guess I'll have to chase him off..." Zim hummed happily and pressed a button to launch the defense command on the  
lawn gnomes.  
  
Nothing happened.  
  
Zim shook the remote repetedly. "What's wrong with this stupid thing?" He checked the bettery pack. "Wha--- empty?! But... I just changed the electric  
modules pack this morning!!"  
  
Gir burped in response.  
  
Zim sighed. "Fine. No big deal. I guess I'd feel better if I took him down WITH MY OWN TWO HANDS!!!" Zim slipped into his disguise and headed out  
the door. Having nothing to do, Gir followed.  
  
"Well..." Dib smirked as Zim walked out the door, "It's about time."  
  
"Today, we end this, *Dib*," Zim snarled.  
  
Dib smiled evily in reply. "Good... I've been awaiting this day for a while."  
  
"Cut the small tlak, human. *Now* we get serious."   
  
Zim ran forward and tackled Dib into the street. Furious, Dib brought his back to prepare delivery of a serious blow, but was stopped by a gloved hand.  
He sneered and slammed his other hand into Zim's face, falling onto his back. Zim reeled back from the strike and lurched forward to knock his   
adversary further into the concrete.  
  
Dib felt his skull being pressed into the road. The pain was unnerving; how was he going to get out of this one?  
  
Suddenly the pressure on his abdomen was lifted, and Dib slowly opened one eye. Gaz was standing above him, holding Zim in the air by his collar.  
"Okay Dib, I've had enough of your stupid games. You can play with Zim later, but right now, I WANT MY SODA!!!" She glared at her brother.  
  
Dib stood up and frowned. "But Gaz! This is the fate of the world we're talking about here! Are you going to let *him* take it over?!"  
  
Gaz looked at Zim and snickered. "Sure," she replied sarcastically.  
  
At that moment, Gir squeaked his head in. "Hi, Master! I unwrapped my cupcake." He held up the glowing cake and opened his mouth to take a bite.  
  
"Gir, NO!" Zim said. But before he got the words out of his mouth, Gir had already bitten into the cupcake.   
  
A bright neon green glow emerged from where the cupcake was bitten into, and the four vanished into the vortex.  
  
  
  
The next thing Gaz could recall, she landed hard on her rear end.  
  
"What the--- where the hell are we?" She looked around and saw Zim, Dib, and Gir appear out of thin air and fall to the ground.  
  
"I... don't.... know..." Gir said and reached for his cupcake. "Where's my cupcake?!"  
  
"I have it," Zim held up the glowing green dessert in a plastic bubble. "I'm keeping it in here. We'll need this to get home."  
  
Dib scoffed. "So just let him eat it, and we'll get out of here."  
  
"Not so fast, *Dib*," Zim scolded. "There are several other dimensions that we could arrive in. Remember Rocket Beach?"  
  
Dib shuddered. "Unfortunately, yes..."  
  
"Exactly. If we let Gir eat this carelessly, we could end up there again--- or worse!!!" Zim screamed. "That's why I want to analyze the cupcake to see  
where we'll end up next."  
  
Din sighed. "I hate to admit it, but that's a good theory."  
  
"Of course it's good!" Zim boasted. "I came up with it!"  
  
"Whatever." Dib took a good look at his new environment. "Where are we, anyway?"  
  
"I don't know..." Zim said slowly. "Everything is all... 3-dimentionalized."  
  
Gaz said nothing, but froze when she turned around. Standing in front of her was a short kid with a big head. He had blue eyes, dumb clothes, and his  
hair looked like it came from an ice-cream machine.   
  
She screamed, one of the rare moments she was scared.  
  
Gir, who was bored out of his mind, screamed along with her.  
  
"What is it?!" Zim and Dib screamed as they turned around. They, too, cried out in fear. The boy spoke.  
  
"Hi. I'm Jimmy Neutron!"  
_____________________  
More chaps to some soon! 


	3. Never Make Zim Mad

(Wow! This got popular pretty fast, didn't it? And to answer Peacemaker Aqua, Jimmy hasn't done anything to Zim - *yet* - but I've gotten very annoyed  
with him over the past few months. That is why I feel the need to destroy him. Any more question? I'm happy to answer them! No? Than read on, my  
minions! READ!!!)  
  
  
  
Jimmy Neutron: Boy RoadKill  
Chapter Three: Never Make Zim Mad  
  
  
Zim stopped screaming. He steped forward and examined the Jimmy-thing in front of him. "Hmm... you're different from the other humans I've seen."  
  
Jimmy smiled proudly. "That's because I'm light years ahead of my race."  
  
Zim frowned. (You can't be light years ahead of MY race!) "Really? And why is that? Can you prove it?"  
  
"Oh, sure! I've invented a hydro-nuclear propelling device, a..."  
  
While Zim was pretending to be interested in what Jimmy had to explain to him, Dib, Gir, and Gaz all snuck away, going tbeir own separate ways, to   
escape the ice-cream head.  
  
"... all in my underground lab!"  
  
Zim nodded. (Hmm... a lab underground, dozens of inventions that only Irk knows about... could he be an alien, too? Is that why he looks different   
from the other humans?) "Tell me... 'Jim-mee', how do you feel about aliens?"  
  
The boy grinned wildly. "Aliens? Oh, I'd love to come in contact with them! I got a message from outer space once, but then, I was teleported to   
school in my underwear..." he blushed, clearly embarrassed.  
  
Zim frowned again. " 'School'?"  
  
"Yeah, why? Don't you go to school?"  
  
"No, I go to 'skool'."  
  
"Uhm..." Jimmy stuttered, "Okay then. Anyway, what do know about alie---"  
  
"I think that it's just a bunch of hype no way they don't exust it's all just a stupid myth." Zim answered in one breath.  
  
"Oh... well, that's okay," Jimmy grinned again, his hopes not shattered at all. "Not everyone believes in aliens. Say..." he looked Zim over. "Your skin  
is... green..."  
  
"INSOLENT FOOL BOY!!! It's a skin condition." Zim quipped smartly.  
  
Jimmy shrugged and pulled out a strange looking device. "That's awful, but don't fear. I have something that might cure that."  
  
Zim back away. "Keep away from me with that... that... THAT!"  
  
"It's not going to hurt... at least," Jimmy said, charging up the gun, "It's not SUPPOSED to hurt!"  
  
Zim bit his lip. "Don't come any closer!! Or I'll... I'll..."  
  
"You'll what?" jimmy asked, looking confused.  
  
"I'll... do something terrible to you, that's what!!" Zim spat, pulling a weapon from his backpod.  
  
"It's okay," Jimmy replied, slowly advancing forward, "This won---"  
  
"THAT'S IT!!" Zim jump backwards, took fast aim, and fired, melting Jimmy's 3-D facade into mush. "I warned you not to come near me. Perhaps that   
was being too kind for me, but you didn't appreciate your... luckyness! And now you're GONE!! HAHAHAHAHA---- hey, where did the Dib go to?"  
  
  
  
Dib sighed and wandered on, looking around with vague interest. "There's nothing good here. All the humans I've passed by are a stupid as the ones  
back home! Isn't there ANYone who had an interest in alines?!"  
  
" ::pant, pant:: DId you say ::snort:: aliens?"  
  
"Huh?" Dib turned to the direciton of the vioce. Standing in front of him was a boy who looked alightly younger than him. He had red hair, freckles,   
glasses, and a poor sense of clothing taste, proven by the hideous stripes he was clad in. "Yeah, I said aliens. Why?"  
  
The other boy wheezed and coughed before responding. "Because I love studying aliens."  
  
Dib smiled. Maybe this dimension wouldn't be so bad after all. "Cool... It's about time I met someone with a healthy interest. My name is Dib."  
  
"I'm Carl."  
  
  
___________________  
Heh heh... how long will Dib's "friendship" with Carl last? Find out... when I update again!! 


	4. Paranormal DOOMigator

(Can I say somthing quick here? Hi. I'm sorry I haven't been able to update this faster, but I've been very sick since last Tuesday. Nice Christmas gift,   
huh? Thank you all for your patience, and when I'm not trying to kill off this evil cold, I'll be making funny stories. I promise.)  
  
  
  
Jimmy Neutron: Boy RoadKill  
Chapter Four: Paranormal DOOMigator  
  
  
Dib nodded. "Oh, um... hi, Carl..."  
  
Carl nodded. "Right, Dib."  
  
Dib smiled nervously. "Uhm Right! So... hey, how about some alien talk?" He asked cheerfully  
  
"Oh.. okay." Carl leaned over real close to Dib's ear. "The thing is, they exist." he nodded gravely.  
  
"I know that!!" Dib shouted. "What's your proof of alien existance?"  
  
"..."  
  
"...Carl?"  
  
"..."  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Dib?"  
  
Dib sighed. "What, Carl?"  
  
"Can I ask a question... a kind of personal one."  
  
"Uhm... okay. Sure, why not?"  
  
"Okay." Carl took a deep breath. "Why is your head big?"  
  
Dib stuck out his lower lip in annoyance. "My head is NOT big."  
  
Carl scratched his head. "You sure?"  
  
"YES! Yes, I assure you my head is the normal size of a normal human!"  
  
"If you say so... it's just that, you don't look like a normal human."  
  
Dib gasped. He was right. The look and texture of the dimension he was in was nothing like his own. Then again, this boy didn't seem as smart as he  
looked. (Perhaps I can use that to my advantage...) "How do I know that YOU'RE the one who isn't normal?"  
  
Carl smiled. "Oh, that's just silly. I look like this world. I belong here."  
  
"That doesn't mean anything."  
  
"It doesn't?"  
  
"Nope."  
  
"So, you're saying I might have been unknowingstly abducted by aliens who have transported me to world where I look like I exist in it but I really exist  
in another world that looks the same?!"  
  
"............................something like that."  
  
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Carl started freasking out at the thought. Dib smirked and leaned against a tree. To his surprise, the tree wilted and  
melted into goo. (Odd...) Dib thought. (It was almost like my touch *poisoned* the tree!) [A/N: Good Nicktoons hurt bad ones.]  
  
Carl took one look at the fallen tree and gaped. "How'd you do that?" he asked slowly.  
  
Dib panicked. "I... I don't know! I just touched it, and..."  
  
"AHHH!! I KNEW IT! YOU'RE AN ALIEN!!" Carl started running around in circles. "That's why your head is big!!!!!!"  
  
Dib stuck out his lower lip in annoyance. "My head is not big!" He yelled. "Why does everyone say that?"  
  
Carl ended up crashing into a tree. He landed on his back and stared up at the sky. Dib loomed over him, causing the round one to shake in fear.  
  
"MY. HEAD. IS. NOT. BIG. I. AM. NOT. AN. ALIEN." Dib screeched. "Get it through your pea-brain." He sighed. (And to think, I thought that the humans  
here were intellegent! Was I ever wrong.) "We're going to have a nice talk about the paranormal, and--- oooo, what's that?" Dib's eye caught a yellow  
spider crawling down the trunk of the tree. "Wow.. Carl, look at this..."  
  
Carl rose. "What is it?"  
  
"Look here. It's a yellow---"  
  
"SPIDER!!! NOnonono! Make it go away! I HATE spiders!!" Once again, the screaming and the running in circles resumed.  
  
Dib groaned and out the spider back on the tree. "What is your problem, Carl?"  
  
Carl sat on the ground and hugged his knees to his chest. "I have...asthma, and... allergies, and... arachnofobia, and... acrofobic..."  
  
"Great, but this spider won't---"  
  
"And... have fear of... aliens with big heads who say I was abducted, ... an---"  
  
(That's IT!) Dib bit down hard on his lip. He grabbed Carl by the shirt collar and started to shake him voilently. "MY HEAD IS NOT... big?" Dib calmed  
down when he saw Carl melting into mush right before his eyes. "Odd.... that's just like the tree..."   
  
Suddenly, Dib had an idea. He ran back over to the second tree and gently picked up the spider. Then he placed it in Carl's watery corpse.  
  
It died instantly. Dib shrugged. "Figures... he was probably more evil than Zim. Heck, he was scarier than Gaz! And..." he trialed off. Where did Gaz  
and Zim go? He decided to go find them.  
  
  
  
Zim walked carefully back the way he came, holding a tracking device in front of him.  
  
"Master, what are you doing?" Gir quiried.  
  
"I'm trying to find the exact spot we entered this smelly realm. If I can find it, then we can go home."  
  
The machine began to blipp wildly. Gir cheered. "Ooo, shiny!"  
  
"Quiet, Gir." Zim pulled a bubble from his backpod. "Here. Eat. But only one bite, you got it?"  
  
"My cupcake!" Gir squealed.he fumbled with the plastic covering.  
  
Zim smiled to himself as he thought about going back home. (Finally, I can go home and wreak havoc with my Voot Runner... without worrying about  
Dib getting in my way...)  
  
The next thing he knew, he heard a loud THUD from behind him. "Ooo, the ship!!"  
  
"Eh?" Zim opened one eye and turned around. "AHH!!! My Voot Cruiser! What is it doing HERE?!?!?!"  
  
Gir shrugged. "I made the cupcake bring it here. " He opened his mouth again.  
  
Zim snatched it. "No. We'll try again later. For now, since I can't wreak havoc on Earth, I'll wreak havoc here." He hopped in his cruiser and sped off,  
flying over Gaz on the way.  
  
____________________________________  
Hmm... what is Gaz going to do to whom she meets? What havoc will Zim wreak? WHill Gir ever get to finish his cupcake? Find out when I update  
again. No spiders were harmed in the making of this chapter. 


End file.
